MCFly’s intrepid reporter Scott Templeton on yesterday’s simply wonderful event at the Town Hall. Read it and weep tears of joy…
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In the Town Hall, very hot
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Death by power point
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Fewer chairs than last year.
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Fewer people sitting in the chairs.
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Richard Leese phoning it in.
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“We’ve done a strategy about something else, let me read to you from it.”
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Line.
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By.
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Line
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Better let both Universities talk now, mustn’t exclude. Marginalise. Annoy.
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Have they got anything to say? Nope.
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Next, Gavin Elliot. Chair, wide smile.
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“We’ll miss the 2020 target by what sounds like a little, but let me explain how it’s actually quite a lot.”
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“This graph shows that every other major city exhibits the same track record in greenhouse gas emissions as Manchester.”
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<Thus proving the futility of this organisation’s existence.>
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Now Johnny Sadler, long time council officer. First in, last out.
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“We have established Manchester Climate Agency CIC (MCCACiC).”
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“Because it was the right thing to do. Not because of cuts and austerity. Definitely not that.”
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***WHITE TEXT ON YELLOW BACKGROUND SLIDES ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!***
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“We’ve set up a community interest company (CIC) to get some funding. But not at the expense of existing organisations. Definitely not that.”
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***WHITE TEXT ON YELLOW BACKGROUND SLIDES ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!***
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The words illegible, eyes straining, the message lost, unreadable.
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Headache grows.
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“Good news on the 2020 target. We’re going to forget about it and set a much more challenging target for 2050. When we will all be retired and/or dead.”
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“We definitely did not set a target in the far distant future because all of us will be retired and/or dead by then. Definitely not that.”
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“Now, let me read to you from our 2050 Strategy.”
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Line.
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By.
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Line.
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“Nearly the last slide, promise. Just a few more slides. Next one, nearly the last one. Stay with me, STAY WITH ME!”
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“PS We run out of money in April 2017. Please give generously.”
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30 fucking minutes. Time, ebbing, lost, never to be recovered.
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Q&A panel: those who can, leave. Others, lost, immobile, empty: stay.
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Panel: white, male, middle aged. Nothing to say.
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“How can we, what might we, err…..<trails in to silence>.”
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The powerlessness of politicians laid bare.
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The empty promise of neo-liberalism.
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A cruel lie.
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Don’t mention the fucking #Brexit
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Leese, dead behind the eyes.
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Here.
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But not here.
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Sadler, crushed under the weight of his own PowerPoint
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***WHITE TEXT ON YELLOW BACKGROUND SLIDES ARE NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!***
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Elliot, smiles.
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Hides the tears well.
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Soul crushed.
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No need to be brave.
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Let the sobs out.
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Loud, long and clear.
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“Thanks for coming!” Polite applause, drinks reception.
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The end.
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“See you all next year!”

There will be 10 free Climate Events in Bolton over the period July 2nd – July 15th organised by the 
Climate change is going to have enormous impacts on the health of the people of Manchester. Whether it is flooding, heat waves, or just good old psychological factors (fear, depression etc).